Why I decided to blog. An Introduction.

(The four of us together on November 22, 2014)

Why blog?

I asked myself this question many times. You see, I've always been an avid reader of blogs, particularly related to Indonesian and South Indian cooking. My husband told me I should start a blog on food and travel (especially since we travel quite extensively with our son since he was a baby) or perhaps on how I keep a sane life, with a career that I love (which often requires late night), a baby, and still manage to eat home cooked meals and get 7-8 hours sleep. But every time I thought about starting one, I stopped myself saying it would take too much time, and frankly I didn't think anyone would be interested to read it. It would be too embarrassing. Plus who would give a hoot about anything I have to say?

But today I have decided to start a blog with the goal to document our story for our 3 yr old son, Ishan and hope that others who happen to stumble upon this blog can relate to them and perhaps even find them useful. I used to worry a lot about loss of privacy in the social media, but now I see it as necessary in order to connect with others. I realize now that human connection is what makes the world go round, and that it is more important than worrying about who sees your photos or knows your real name...

The deciding moment for starting this blog actually happened 38 days ago. My husband and I had lost our daughter, Dayani, our second born, my little girl, Ishan's little sister on November 23rd, 2014. She was a 34-week preemie and was one week old when she passed away. She died from a fatal and rare condition called Fetal Akinesia syndrome. As a way to cope with the reality of having just given birth and being told that my daughter would not make it, I wrote to her everyday since the day after she was born. I wrote her letters in her baby book, letting her know my most intimate thoughts and feelings for her and what our family was going through. The world as I knew it was shattered into a million pieces... It was over...

It was during this vulnerable time that I realized  how much I wanted my son to know this part of our story well.  I want to write these things down for him while the details are still fresh because life is not guaranteed, memory fades and tomorrow may never come.

It is with these thoughts in mind that I started this blog. This blog is dedicated to my Ishan.